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EoM are pains la

Angelus blogged at 10:04 PM

Angelus blogged at 8:44 PM

the last post was removed not cause i was feeling guilty. it is cause its risky to put it up. you never know who reads what nowadays. :) thanks for the warning butfart.

Angelus blogged at 8:47 PM

the ReAson why he feels sCrewed InSide hiMself.

yes people i am here right now after half the week gone by n lets just say its kinda been from bad to teruk. haha. i havent gotten much sleep lately n well.. i just have been having a lot on my platter as usual. just so tired.

been wondering. the carpenters son never made for the mayors daughter? but who was to say the daughter belonged to the mayor, n if so, what be wrong in the carpenters son marrying the mayors daughter?

look deep n you would know what i mean

Angelus blogged at 9:45 PM

there are things in life we just dont understand....

this week was one very slow week. there was student council installation, racial harmony, ptm, new chapter in bio n maths n chem. more hw for malay. but thats just the surface of the papaya. there i still the juicier inside filled with the many seeds.

what am i talking about? im talkin about the high emotions, the scrumptious tensions n the never ending laughter. yes last week was one hell of a week. flared up at my captain, fought with my parents n solved people's shit. it wasnt much to deal with cause i always could rely on you to talk to.

but at the end of the day, i have come to realise that some of our choices in life may seem bad at first but in the future you would begin to realise that they are actually blessings in disguise. just like how it seems god has punished me with my results, i think it will seem as a blessing in the future for its this results that are spurrin me on to study harder to prove to others my worth. n its the results of others that have spurred me to lend a hand to those who have fallen. for i never know when i would need one.
we will prove them wrong, showin them we are capable by ourselves.we kniw what we are doing.
n just like how it seems my choice to quit teaching yesterday seems bad, i know that i would leave this knowing that the next thing i undertake will not be as bad cause ive grown to see what im capable of n what i can do.
n who knows, its only a year more for him to go. (:

well that doesnt mean i go straight into making wrong choice rights? haha yeah its all abt your instinct n taking risk n knowing when all is lost. there is some things in life we just understand. there are thing in life that we know not of what is gg to be. but why should that stop us?

well im hoping that the upcomin week goes well.

Angelus blogged at 5:40 PM

you should listen to this song, it is very apt to what i wanna say to you.
Edwin McCain - Ill Be (Your Crying Shoulder)
The strands in your eyes that color them wonderful
Stop me and steal my breath
And emeralds from mountains thrust towards the sky
Never revealing their depth

Tell me that we belong together
Dress it up with the trappings of love
I'll be captivated, I'll hang from your lips
Instead of the gallows of heartache that hang from above

Chorus:
I'll Be your cryin' shoulder
I'll Be loves suicide
I'll Be better when I'm older
I'll Be the greatest fan of your life

And rain falls angry on the tin roof
As we lie awake in my bed
You're My Survival, You're My Living Proof
My love is alive and not dead

Tell me that we belong together
Dress it up with the trappings of love
I'll be captivated, I'll hang from your lips
Instead of the gallows of heartache that hang from above

yeah today was racial harmoy yaw. it be some interesting stuff. missed doin bhangra again sia. lol. but yeah. spent the day stonin n just talkin to ppl. yeah those that wore the ethnic costumes looked great man. yeah n so did you. (:

11 days and countng i wonder if you would overcome fear n take that risk with me.

feeling rather tired today after the days event though glad for a friend n wishes him all the best man. holy grenade them if needed. hahaha. or a rain of thumbtacks(shooting blanks).
i wanna hold you close

Angelus blogged at 8:42 PM

yesterday started off damn early sia. woke up at 6 to make my way to CJ to meet chang yong so that we could go to NJ for CIP. walked from one end to the other end of the school entrance cause the gates were closed n only to find out that the only gate open is right at the back. wtf? haha. yeah so after entering school i met buddha at NJ. chatted for a while n caught up.

finally we got to work by cutting cloth. freaky sia, yahui. future seamstress? haha. nah she is just pro la. iqbal n chang yong took the same amt of time to cut one strip of cloth while yahui cut nine!! yeah then we found this particlar system of cuttin which made things damn fast, well most of it involved yahui doing n me n papaya lookin in awe.

by the time our pile hit 15.5cm we went for a 15 n half minute break where i had bubble tea n sticky chewy chocolate. when we returned we began to make the actual dols which were quite funny i must say. cracked a lot of jokes. made fun of bernice. taunted chang yong as always. lol. by the time we finished 50 it was 1pm. so we packed up n left Nj.

not sure where the others went after that but i went back to plan lesson for cat class. took a short nap n then went for class. then after class i met yahui at the bus stop so we could go for mass. gave her flowers to cheer her post exam feelings. we went for mass slightly late but only missed haf the opening hymn. so no big deal. the sermon was funny sia. haha wth yahui? rishi the neighbour?? lol.

after mass me n yahui took a bus to orchard. in which my card decided to die on me so we got it checked out at the MRT. dunno what the lady was mumbling to her self. suddenly she started using a maker n coloured my card. must have had a deprived pre school life, must colour my card .then she gave me this other card n said use the card n replace it n refunded me money n i was just nodding away not knowin what in the bue papaya she was talkin abt.

then we walked out of orchard MRT n called Rishi for directions to Zouk. hahaha. n dunno what avocado shit he as telin me, sounded like he just woke up but yeah we eventually made our way to great world there.well we spent some time at Zouk then we went to Zion Rd to makan. haha yahui n i decided to not eat char kway teow then cause the queue was damn long.

then we walked in to Great World to eat dessert at some yoghurt parlour. i had peach n strawberries whilst yahui had kiwi cranberries. haha she fed me her yoghurt n it was damn sour sia. bleah. hahaha then i fed her mine n it was sweeter tasting. then we went to buy liqour n gave her a small lesson on liqour. we then bought vodkan drank while waitin for time to pass so that we could catch a movie. her ears turne red again. hahaha betul cakap kamu, iqbal.

then the movie was abt to start so we went in. was feeling kinda sleepy. slept a bit here n there n so did yahui. but i didnt seem to miss as much as her. movie was ok a. nothing fantastic caue the plot was jagged. but the action was good. by the time the movie ended it was 0115hrs sia. so we took a walk outside Great World n flagged a cab while talkin rubbish again. finally a cab stopped n i sent yahui back home first n thenheaded back home myself. by the time i reached home it was abt 2 plus. then went online n talked to yahui for abt 45 minutes n then went to hit the sack.

what a day eh? damn long but fun n satisfyin nonetheless. it was a awesome day spent again. (: hope you had fun too.

well then i woke up this morning at 11 plus. back to reality. got maths, cham n malay to get done soon. talked to darren n yahui the whole morning. made a banana smoothie with chocolate fudge inside. sinful indulgences. sigh. haha. finally here ends the post sia. rather long one but worth every word sayin.

times a ticking..

Angelus blogged at 2:33 PM

i got back my results. it sucked. i hate it. i just dont wanna think abt it anymore la.


oh well today was rather mundane as usual. went to school damn early n did my rencana. then there was bio lecture which i was followin from start to end sia. amazing right? haha. yeah but it was funny at times. then i had maths tutorial where she didnt fail to mention how lousy we were again. but i was beginning to get the concept i think. lets hope la

then it be break. after break it was malay in which i spent my lessn out of class cause kena kicked out with the rest of the class. well then i went back for chem which i slept half of it away. n the other half merely stoning cause a lot of things were on my mind. you just dont know when to shut the fuck up do you? you keep talkin these days at just the wrong times is beginning to piss me off. n furthermore you be having no life meddling in others. soon you are gg to die if u dont know what the right times to do things is. fucktard,.

yeah then had maths which i was sorta following but then to be honest i wasnt writing much la. hahahaha. n then iqbal came back with the Katira. lol. well the usual card playin took place n eventually me, iqbal n tim went to starbucks to chill. MY GOSH IT BE DA SEkS. why??! cause we were doing random stuff. have quite a lot of embarassin videos n photos n shit on my phone. haha up to our discretion on who to show la. a side of us you have not seen, rest assured. you must be special. haha. wth? lol.

in the spirit of the moment we will be havin CIP tmr...

how fun,

mah fun,

hor fun,

cheeng chiong fun,

papaya..

Angelus blogged at 9:32 PM

this be some lumpy avocado shit.

Angelus blogged at 8:59 PM

sweet child of mine!


today was the most redundant day, sumpah! I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR ONE CHEM LECTURE...

n then wasted 5hrs in school doin nothing. why? cause mr bala decided to have some makan time with the MOE. n manbeast once again wasnt in school. so yeah only interestin thing was that me n joe went on an escapade to island creamery. rather fun.. (:

haha i swear your oral was better than the one i had la. but hey if its one of your strong subjects then hey.. i suppose you would feel a bit toot.

well the day was filed with emotions as i listen to somethin that was never gonna happen. hope you dont fall flat on the ground with your face in the mud.

i see the sparkle of life shining
as you look straight ahead.
i know that you see me tryin
but you just turn your head.

i begin to wonder what it was
that made me so in love with you
but everytime i have any doubt
i see your face and all is true.

you hold a place in my heart
i know that it will never leave me
ill let u know this one thing.. no matter what
ill be here supportin you to the end.

i hope you give it a chance,
taking a risk with me with nothing holdin back
cause there is nothing to loose.
we can see what lies ahead
if we just took a chance.

Angelus blogged at 7:42 PM

there is a feeling of great satisfaction and accomplishment. why? cause it is sorta over... yeah well if it does start up again i know what to do eventhough i rather not. but you have been warned.

i got nothing much to say tonight. the wind is blowingreally strong out side n the weather is rather shiok. so i guess ill get some work done n turn in early.

there was a time when it was simply wonderful, now it has become eternally blissful. although suddenly i feel you drift from my fingers .

there is hope in the darkness, n i know we can make it.. - dawsons creek.

Angelus blogged at 10:47 PM

Angelus blogged at 12:07 AM

It's gonna take a lot to drag me away from you,
There's nothing that a hundred men or more could ever do
I bless the rains down in Africa
Gonna take some time to do the things we never had

today i woke up at freakin 4 to get ready for the tournament at SRC. met ming at city hall at 645 to help him carry the shit from his car n collect our away jerseys. then the wind began to blow really strong. n i was startin to freeze n my knees were hurting... n then... it poured!!!
yeah the next 2 and a half hours was spent taking shelter in SRC cause it was rainin heavily. n then i began to wonder, wht on earth would i be doing had i not had to come here. Sleeping. sigh... well after waitin for so long.... the tournament was postponed. so at 10 i was at subway with the guys eating breakfast while majority of singapore slept in with the wonderful weather.

then after that the guys decideed to go to douby ghaut to plan LAN. haha its been a damn long time since i touched counter strike n dota. well eventually after playin for abt an hour we went to the arcade where me n Feng agreed to play bishi bashi. haha ming joined in. it as damn fun to see a bunch of grown boys play such a game n get all high in emotions. haha with 5 credits left... all 5 of us went to play a game of daytona.

well after that we all went back home. man i was so tired i knocked out. cb our hockey tournament ended up to be a damn early morning hockey outing. which ended at 2?!? isnt that the time that most ppl go out for outings? haha i was returnin.

well rusty woke me up at abt 5 and i decided to go for Novena at novena church.heard a few inspirational thanksgiving n petitions. then i walked into the shop n something struck my eye. a cross that was shaped in a form of wings.

somehow i think its god's sign. this has happened three times alr. every cross i have worn has had a significant meaning to it. n most of the time it reminds me of what is lackin in my life or what i need to keep in mind. the first cross was eugene's present to me last year with my love symbol on it. the cross was appropriate at that time cause i was startin to give up on love after a lot of shit was happening. i wore that cross to remind me of the people that have loved me n how i need to reciprocate it. then at the end of last year i got a cross that had the eucharist n chalice to remind me of the blessings of being catholic. i got this from my godfather n it was really apt at that tme cause i was taking catholism for granted untill i was awestruck by the design of the cross n how it reminds me of the divinity of the last supper n how it is to be a servant leader.

now today, i saw this winged shaped cross at the shop n the same queer feeling filled me. i stared at the note below it n it said it represented the holy spirit. n i begn to reflect on how ive been lacking the guidance of the holy spirit not cause it wasnt there, but because i never thought of seeking it. so now i wear this cross to remind me the holy spirit is always in me.

now i have a total of three crosses that i will wear when the need arises for it.

i believe in you, cause you have not let me down. i dont think you ever will.

Angelus blogged at 7:52 PM

Cause i, need time, My heart is numb has no feeling, So while im still healing, Just try and have a little patience

bio was ok la. bernice u are an instigator. n u said i would get beaten up?? haha we will see...

well malay oral was bad.. i was cursin in hokkien when the topic came out sia. haha what a bilinugal peice of shit in my head. what kind of topic is " exploration is a hobby that brings benefits to life" ? wtf la.

haha but i went out with labqi n we be having a great 3hrs talkin rubbish at starbucks. oh yeah thank you germaine for stealin my book. that be some jackass shit sial. hahha

feeling very weird in a sense tat i feel im loosin something. sigh. tmr... hockey tournament. i shall play to have fun.

Angelus blogged at 11:24 PM

ok this be more cheem shit for the peeps.

the one who fails to take a risk cause he fears the result is the one that lives a secluded life

the one who fails to take a risk cause of uncertainty if it really what he or she wants is the
one that is boring n rather not try new things.

the one who fails to take the risk cause of fear of judgement is the one that is self judged already.

the one that takes the risk but when fails complains, is the one that doesnt cherish the experience

the one that takes the risk n succeeds becomes stregthen to take more.

the one that takes risk but fails n fears not is the one that understands the complexity of life

NOW the one who takes the risk n believe he succeded eventhough he stereotypically failed, is the one who is da seks.

hahha. this be only understandable to some.. some may claim repitition but look carefull n think..

Angelus blogged at 10:50 PM

loosin my religion. tryin to keep up with you. n i dont know if can do it. oh no i said too much... i havent said enough.


its a sacrifice im willing to make once again. painful as it is. keepin u in the dark, though i dont want to, but i need to do this. you wont know what ive done but its not like i want u to feel grateful or even regret puttin me through the trouble. i do this on y own acord. i sever ties with my own choice.

yet keepin in mind, while doin this, the carpenters son was never made for the mayor's daughter.

hope u have a nice day.

Angelus blogged at 7:41 PM

WARNING!!! : Emo post.

yes this be one of those rare occasion once again that ryan decides to be emo.

no one asked you to be perfect n yet perfection is often seen as the key factor to why a relationship should fail or let alone exist!. but honestly true perfection to me is just the right amount of imperfection. imagine this if a girl is perfect n flawless then there would be a lot of problems.
1) firstly the girl would make my already flawed self seem so much worse than it already is. ; i look bad
2) if a girl be stereotypically perfect, there would be no ups or downs in the relationship. basically the reationship will be on one that will be lived on cocaine; haha only when ur arent in reality
3) this is never going to hapen so why actually kid yourself into thinkin it may n force it out. cause honestly living a relationship like you are on cocaine.... haha.. dream on.. or rather take more cocaine. (:

but then again... im not sayin i want a completeyl flawed retard of a girl. no! my perfect girl is someone that is in her own smal ways imperfect n knows it too. n isnt it enough that i fell for who she is? why on earth would i want to change her to be my perfect little girl if she already is perfect the first time i met her. awesome as she is even now.

now does that mean i am completely ok with a girl that is imperfect. NO! what do u think im retarded? of course its human nature to not be happy with the other half's flaws. but thats what a relationship is abt. true i would express my disagreements with her. like i said a strong relationship is only one that is filled with ups n downs.

which brings me to the difference in acceptance n allowance. in a good strong relationship its filled with compromises not cause of the sake of a good relationship but because u are crazy abt her that you would compromise for her. that means u accept her flaws. u accept the fact thats it is in her n that u fell for the whole package. cause honestly we live in a world where everyone has flaws la so dont fool yourself to think ill ever find a girl who is flawless. haha joke.

but does that mean u let the other half get away ith her flaws? duh. u guessed it.. NO! ill give u an example. what better example then my own. for those who know me well im one hell of a hot tempered guy (note: 1T30 hot tempered different from quick tempered) so that basically means when i blow it u wouldnt like it. but ive done a good job not to blow up with u guys. so back to point.. now my friends have accepted the fact that one of my many flaws is being hot tempered. but that doesnt mean they would allow me to blow up. they sure as hell, n i pray they do, will put me back to place. thats called allowance. in a relationship you cannot have too much allowance cause thats as crazy as the first sentence of this para.

so you see, this is what maintains a good relationship. i know ill never come across THE perfect girl in my life. but then again i have fallen in love with one whom i deem perfect in my eyes because i know this. i wont change her, i accept her n ill compromise with her. n i know she would do the same for me. n im just so crazt abt her.

i fell in love with you for who you are, the whole package, the deal that sealed my pumping heart. n i want u to know that.
you have captured my heart, u wonderful girl n i u r perfect to me.
haha this be some really emo + depth post but the next time you are in a relationship n have problems, keep this in mind. n for those aspiring for a relationship with that sunshine of yours this may come in handy.

Angelus blogged at 8:20 PM

Your Power Color Is Red-Orange

At Your Highest: You are warm, sensitive, and focused on your personal growth. At Your Lowest: You become defensive and critical if you feel attacked. In Love: You are loyal - but you demand the respect you deserve. How You're Attractive: You are very affectionate and inspire trust. Your Eternal Question: "Am I Respected?"

Angelus blogged at 9:43 PM

im damn bored now. wth is gg on man. this be some noob shit

Angelus blogged at 10:45 PM

ok physically tired aftre the two days with the dog. he has been awesome just havin a bit of a problem with me leaving the house without him. cause he follows me everywhere now. woke quite early today n went to walk the dog. then i took it to the vet n got it checked for any microchips. no chips sp no owner as of yet. nothin seems to be wrong with him. went back home at abt 11 after buyin some toys n showerin him. smelt like oranges after that.

after lunch i went down to eugene's house to play squash for the first time. yeah i left rusty at home n he gave my brother a bit of trouble b4 settlingdown. well had fun catchin up once again. then i bought that long island drink that joe mentioned b4. my gosh joe your taste for alcohol must be nuts. it was disgustin to me. kinda tasted like cough medicine. yeah so i took a bit of coke from eugenes house.

then i went home n rusty went beserk upon seein me. as if he were showinme his house sia. jump here n there, run in n out. sigh but he has he habit of bitin me when he is happy which i gotta stop soon. oh i got my hair cut n clean shaved after a long time. well my hair was gettin a bit out of hand n since school is startin i decided i wont have any time should i postpone.
but i feel i cut it a bit too short sia. maybe the effects of having long hair for quite some time . sigh. but oh well id let the class decide tmr. whats done is done eh.

well rusty is asleep in my room once again. idiot wont sleepin his own room so i guess he is sleepin in mine. funny how simple a dogs life is. he gets to sleep as n when he pleases. n yet he hardly chooses that option. lol.

release me of this chain that is holdin me back, for you are the only one that has the key.

Angelus blogged at 9:17 PM

You Are Literally Hot
Some people are just not built for summer. For some, the term "hot as hell" is all too literal. You might be one of those people whose long-sleeved shirts sit lovingly folded in the drawer all summer long so you can pull them out and bury your face in them and wish ever so hard for Fall to come back. Stay cool, hon... it'll be over before you know it.
21% of the people who took this quiz got the same evaluation.

ok joanne i did both this time. haha, damn it i cant see some peoples recent post for some reason. nabei.

Angelus blogged at 10:50 PM

ok it be along time since ive blogged. well a up to date post with the happenings in my life.

THE EXAMS ARE OVER BALLS!!!!!

yesh finally it be over.

-a day of releif-

Angelus blogged at 1:51 AM